Somewhere along growing up from a pretty awful, anxious home life to losing almost all of my high school friends has made me ice cold. I’ve always had walls made of concrete, but they’re slowly growing even higher and it seems almost impossible to crash them down. I feel like I’m drowning in a pond of my own demons. Growing up without true and open relationships has made me convinced that there’s almost no such thing.
But I do know there is. It’s so hard for me to understand and open up myself. I feel that I close myself off to the people I care about most. I’m so hard to handle, I’m sorry.